When Couples Therapy Is The Lifeline You Need

Life in Washington, DC can feel relentless. Between demanding careers, long commutes, and a social culture where professional achievement is often front and center, it’s easy for your relationship to slide into the background. Many couples find themselves locked in the same arguments, feeling distant even when they’re together, or silently wondering if the relationship can survive betrayals of trust. These challenges can feel especially isolating when everyone around you seems to be achieving professional success while you’re struggling at home.

Couples therapy provides a chance to pause and look at your relationship differently. My work with couples centers on helping you slow down conflict, understand the deeper dynamics driving your struggles, and learn new ways of relating that feel supportive, respectful, and safe.

What Couples Therapy Looks Like When You Work With Me

When couples first walk in, they’re often carrying years of pain and frustration. Sometimes it shows up as the same fight playing out again and again while at other times, it’s the distance that builds up between them when they stop turning toward one another.

In our sessions together you can expect to:

  • Identify your patterns. We begin by slowing down and mapping out the negative cycles that pull you into the same arguments, so you can start to recognize them in real time.
  • Make space for emotions. It’s common to think you’re fighting about money, chores, or schedules, but underneath those practical issues are usually feelings of loneliness, longing, or fear. Therapy gives emotions space to be acknowledged in ways that bring you closer instead of pushing you further apart.
  • Practice new ways of connecting: As the process unfolds, you’ll try out different communication and repair strategies in the room. Couples often tell me the most helpful part is being able to practice these changes with my support, so they feel ready to bring them into daily life.

I consider it a privilege to sit with couples in these moments, to hold space for both the hurt and the hope. My role is not to assign blame or take sides, but to create a space where both partners feel heard and respected especially when they come into therapy for the first time.

Common Reasons Couples Seek Therapy

Every couple has conflict, but sometimes the tension becomes so much that it starts to feel impossible to manage on your own. In my practice, I work with couples across all stages from those beginning to drift apart, to those wondering if they can stay together at all.

Here are some of the struggles that most often bring couples into my office:

  • Conflict that won’t stop: Repeating arguments that never resolve can leave both partners feeling exhausted and hopeless. In therapy, I help you understand what’s really at stake beneath the surface fight, learn tools to engage in fair fights and develop conflict resolution skills for when disagreements start to occur.
  • Communication breakdowns: Feeling unheard or misunderstood, even in simple conversations, builds frustration over time. Together, we work on ways of speaking and listening that make room for clarity and respect.
  • Infidelity and betrayal: Navigating the aftermath of an affair means facing anger, grief, and fear all at once. Therapy provides a structured place to unpack those feelings and begin the hard work of deciding what healing looks like for your relationship.
  • Lack of intimacy: When partners feel more like roommates than lovers, the absence of closeness can be deeply painful. Sessions help you explore what gets in the way of connection and how to rebuild both physical and emotional intimacy.
  • Life transitions: Adjusting to parenthood, career changes, or moves can strain even the strongest bonds. Therapy helps couples talk honestly about stress and support one another through new seasons of life. I also frequently see couples facing events that can shake a partnership like job loss, changes in health status, or the death of a loved one.
  • Considering separation or divorce: Some couples come to therapy unsure if they should stay together. Our work gives you space to explore those questions openly, with respect and clarity.
  • Premarital questions: Many couples want guidance before marriage on how to build a strong foundation. Premarital counseling gives you the chance to discuss expectations, roles, parenting styles, and even in-law relationships before you make a lifelong commitment.

Whatever brings you in, couples therapy offers a structured space to address what feels stuck and move toward repair.

My Approach to Couples Counseling: Balancing Insight With Practical Change

Starting couples therapy can feel intimidating, especially when fighting, disconnection, or lack of trust and intimacy make you feel alone. In my work with couples, I integrate several therapeutic approaches so we can match what’s happening in the room. My intention is to help you reconnect and feel supported from the start, knowing that both of you will be respected. 

After laying the groundwork for safety and respect, we’ll decide together which tools are most helpful in the moment. Depending on what’s happening in the room, I draw from several approaches:

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): 

  • EFT helps couples identify the emotional cycles underneath conflict and learn new ways to respond to each other.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT): 

  • CBT offers tools to challenge assumptions, reframe patterns of blame, and practice new communication skills.

Insight-Oriented Therapy: 

  • Recognizes that both partners have patterns of relating stemming from earlier formative experiences that impact their relationship. Helps both members better understand what is transpiring and why, as well as new more constructive ways of relating.

What matters most is that therapy feels both reflective and practical. You’ll leave sessions not only with new insight, but also with concrete tools to bring into your daily life. Above all, I want couples therapy to feel like a safe place where both of you are respected, where the conflict can quiet down enough for each partner to be truly heard, and where the skills you practice inside the room can become the bridge back to your everyday life.

Begin Your Couples Therapy Journey

Whether you’re worn down by conflict, reeling from betrayal, or simply wanting to feel closer again, couples therapy can help you find a way forward. Together we’ll look at what isn’t working, rediscover what drew you together, and practice new ways of relating that bring relief and hope.

Contact: 571-882-1648 | dralexafram@gmail.com
Office: 1701 K Street NW, Suite 900, Washington, DC 20006
(Above Farragut North at K & 17th ST NW)

Couples Therapy In Washington, DC FAQs:

How do I know if we need couples therapy?

If you’re stuck in repeating arguments, feeling emotionally distant, or questioning the future of your relationship, therapy can help. Many couples tell me they waited too long before reaching out and that coming in sooner might have saved years of pain and disconnection.

Can therapy help us heal after infidelity or betrayal?

Yes. Infidelity can feel like an earthquake shaking the foundation of your relationship. In affair recovery therapy, we slow down the rush of emotions so each partner can speak and be heard without the conversation breaking down. Healing requires honesty, accountability, and a willingness to sit with painful feelings, but it also needs a safe space where those emotions don’t spiral out of control. We move slowly enough that painful emotions can be expressed without overwhelming the process.

What if we’re struggling with intimacy?

Intimacy is more than physical closeness. It includes the everyday sense of feeling like a team. Over time, careers, kids, and stress can chip away at that bond. In our sessions, I help couples define what intimacy really means to them and talk about it without shame. We’ll look at how old hurts, miscommunication, or unspoken needs get in the way, and practice new ways of reaching for each other. This kind of intimacy counseling can help rebuild the rituals of affection and care that allow you to feel loved, seen, and chosen again.

Is premarital counseling worth it?

Absolutely. Premarital counseling in DC is one of the most valuable investments you can make in your relationship. We’ll talk through how you want to share responsibilities, make financial decisions, and handle conflict when it arises. We’ll also explore sensitive areas like parenting styles, in-law dynamics, and the values you want to carry forward together. Addressing these topics before marriage helps you enter your commitment with clarity, strength, and a deeper sense of partnership.

What does a typical couples session look like?

Sessions are 50 minutes. We’ll focus on identifying your patterns, slowing down conflict, and practicing new ways to connect. My goal is that both partners feel heard and leave each session with something practical to try at home.

 

Do you work with married and unmarried couples?

Yes. I see couples at all stages: dating, engaged, married, or long-term partnerships. The issues may differ, but the work of building safety and connection is always central.

Do you offer virtual couples therapy?

Yes. I offer couples counseling in Washington, DC in-person and virtually, and virtually for those in PSYPACT states. Many couples appreciate the flexibility of being able to connect even on busy days.

What if my partner is hesitant to come?

It’s common for one partner to be more reluctant. Often, attending a first session together helps ease concerns and shows how the process works. I’ll make space to talk about those hesitations openly.

What if therapy doesn’t save our relationship?

If you decide that you can’t save your relationship, therapy can still help you separate with clarity and respect, reducing the pain and confusion of ending a partnership. Many couples find that even if they choose to part, the process leaves them stronger and more grounded for the future.